What does it mean to be partners?

[vintagewitch]

Putting this here because it was a pretty good read. Very much about the author's personal experience, but these are things I've been thinking about lately with Matt having been gone for so long.

What does it mean to be partners?

Bigger post later today - I've got some errands to run, some writing to do, some grad school stuff to figure out, and I should get cracking.

Comments

[untonuggan]

I have to say, my favorite part was the poem. But also, good article. :)

At first I thought it was going to be about non-legally-recognized-or-binding long-term relationships. I have thinky-thoughts on those, too.

[vintagewitch]

I think I just really like the questions it brought up for me - not necessarily as articulated in the article, but the things it made me think about how my relationship is forming. I've been thinking a lot about what it means to be partners particularly from a distance, or when one person is traveling a lot for work. We have, by nature, an extremely independent relationship, but I've been wanting more. (Also hard to work out the "wanting more!" pieces from the "miss you!" pieces, because long distance.)

Also that poem IS killer.

Do you know of any articles/blog posts/other things about non-legally-binding/recognized long term relationships? I feel like people don't often write to that - and when I did a cursory google search, it was all "The Long Road To Marriage" and "Long Term Relationship Rut." It doesn't seem like that's a relationship that people are writing much about - though again, that was just a cursory google search

[untonuggan]

I don't know any posts like that, but I would probably look for posts by same-sex couples living in a time(!)/place where they couldn't legally get married, writing about their relationship(s). Right now all the top hits are about the Supreme Court decision tho? IDK, my youngest two cousins are both in long-term relationships with 3 kids and no marriage certificate, and my friend's mom is on her third relationship of 17 years and has her own house and no legal status because her other marriages did not go well. So it totally does happen, just...maybe people feel weird writing about it?

Also awkward: what box to tick at the dr's office when they ask your marital status. I mean, I know some of it is for insurance purposes, but also if they are doing anything with sexual health then they should really be asking about, y'know, behavior and not whether I have a ring or whatever. Some married people have open relationships! Some people who are "legally single" are in long-term monogamous relationships! Yup.

[grackle]

Great article. This is my favorite article about relationships. It helped me stop getting into horrible ones (I have a knack for that).