I don't know why I feel this way
Oct. 19th, 2024 07:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vintagewitchI had such a weird experience yesterday regarding my business and it has sent me into an absolute tailspin.
There's a new conference happening up north, and way back in May I applied to vend at it. I had just assumed I didn't get in because I never received an email. The conference is Nov 1-3 and I wasn't planning on going because it's 3 hours away.
I got an email yesterday from the organizers of the conference with details. The event is 14 days away.
I emailed them back right away, saying I had never heard back from them and therefore couldn't do it anymore. They emailed me with proof of a $300 invoice that I paid to vend at the event. I haven't replied to that email yet, I'm not sure how. Then I remembered what happened: I paid the invoice in July, when I was suffering from daily migraines from a terrible work situation. I was in an absolute fugue state and thought I was paying a fee for a different conference I'm vending at next weekend. And still, I think it's really weird and suspicious that I never got an actual email, no marketing materials, no other communication from them. I don't know what to do.
I just ended a temp job on Friday, I've barely had any weekends to myself, the book launches on Nov 4, and I'm terrified because I truly do not have the money I need to make this happen. Because this isn't like a conference where I can show up and it's an easy thing; I need to find a place to stay. I had RSVPd for a wedding on Nov 1, it's my family's women's weekend that weekend. But I read the fine print and there's no way to get a refund - the last time to get a refund was Sept 1.
I've been spiraling ever since, and I don't know what to do. My mental health has been in a freefall. How could I do something so stupid? How did I lose track of this? I feel so completely blindsided and scared about money. And there's also the fact that it's a *new* conference - I don't know if enough people will be attending who would be interested in buying my ritual oils and books to make it truly worth it.
I think tomorrow I might reach out to the organizer again and basically say "Hey, there was a mix up here. I was having a severe health issue when I paid the fee for this, and because I haven't received any other communication from you I didn't put it together that I was supposed to be there for this event." But that just sounds so STUPID. I've searched through my email and only finding invoices from them, no actual communication.
This is so weird.
I don't know what I need. I feel like posting on Dreamwidth is really shouting into the void, but if anyone has any comforting words I would appreciate them. I feel like I'm coming apart at the seams. I'm having a serious functional drop, barely able to do anything, and all of my edges feel sharp.
shanaqui
There's a new conference happening up north, and way back in May I applied to vend at it. I had just assumed I didn't get in because I never received an email. The conference is Nov 1-3 and I wasn't planning on going because it's 3 hours away.
I got an email yesterday from the organizers of the conference with details. The event is 14 days away.
I emailed them back right away, saying I had never heard back from them and therefore couldn't do it anymore. They emailed me with proof of a $300 invoice that I paid to vend at the event. I haven't replied to that email yet, I'm not sure how. Then I remembered what happened: I paid the invoice in July, when I was suffering from daily migraines from a terrible work situation. I was in an absolute fugue state and thought I was paying a fee for a different conference I'm vending at next weekend. And still, I think it's really weird and suspicious that I never got an actual email, no marketing materials, no other communication from them. I don't know what to do.
I just ended a temp job on Friday, I've barely had any weekends to myself, the book launches on Nov 4, and I'm terrified because I truly do not have the money I need to make this happen. Because this isn't like a conference where I can show up and it's an easy thing; I need to find a place to stay. I had RSVPd for a wedding on Nov 1, it's my family's women's weekend that weekend. But I read the fine print and there's no way to get a refund - the last time to get a refund was Sept 1.
I've been spiraling ever since, and I don't know what to do. My mental health has been in a freefall. How could I do something so stupid? How did I lose track of this? I feel so completely blindsided and scared about money. And there's also the fact that it's a *new* conference - I don't know if enough people will be attending who would be interested in buying my ritual oils and books to make it truly worth it.
I think tomorrow I might reach out to the organizer again and basically say "Hey, there was a mix up here. I was having a severe health issue when I paid the fee for this, and because I haven't received any other communication from you I didn't put it together that I was supposed to be there for this event." But that just sounds so STUPID. I've searched through my email and only finding invoices from them, no actual communication.
This is so weird.
I don't know what I need. I feel like posting on Dreamwidth is really shouting into the void, but if anyone has any comforting words I would appreciate them. I feel like I'm coming apart at the seams. I'm having a serious functional drop, barely able to do anything, and all of my edges feel sharp.
I'm vending at another market tomorrow and then teaching on Monday and I just. Want to collapse.
EDIT:
Thank you so much to everyone who commented on this entry. What I didn't mention last night was that I had applied with a friend of mine who is also a professional tarot reader and they didn't receive any communication either and had accepted other gigs more locally to where we live. I adapted an email script from
shanaquiand sent them the following:
"Hi, thanks for clarifying this.
I thought this invoice I paid was for another event, due to a mix-up, as I was pretty unwell at the time.
I also didn't receive any other contact of the kind I expect from these events from you apart from the invoice, which led me to believe it had fallen through. I wanted to flag that up in case anything went wrong and I should have been receiving more information (if there was some issue, it may have affected other people as well). I usually expect an event of this size to be communicative about things far in advance of 14 days before the meeting, including graphics I can use to help promote, an early list of vendors, and more. This is especially important as this is a conference that many people will be traveling to and need to make arrangements for.
Apologies for any inconvenience, but I won't be able to attend. I would appreciate it if a refund of the $300 would be possible, even given the late date, given the absence of the kind of communication I would expect from an event. I understand if not, as I went through the invoices and read the terms. Even a partial reimbursement would restore some of my trust in this event in the future. If I do not hear from you I will assume that no reimbursement is possible and that you have received this email from me.
Thank you,
Siri
Thank you,
Siri
